Excitement is within.
Outside excitement is boring and numbing.
Excitement is within.
It’s like a kid playing with toy soldiers,
If he doesn’t have toy soldiers — he will play with any stick or rock,
He will joke and laugh and say what he wants.
That’s not to say he won’t ever get bored,
But look how much fun he can derive from a single toy.
You have a million things to do and a million toys.
You don’t need more.
You don’t need to fly to see how the other side of the earth looks — it fucking looks the same,
You don’t need a new toy. You already said you needed a new toy the last time.
You don’t need more “action”. You don’t need more “stimulation”. It’s all nonsense. You only have as much stimulation as you can make YOURSELF stimulated.
You should know that,
You probably would know that — if you look over your million toys, distractions, stupid activates and projects, pictures from vacations….
You WOULD know that — if not for the fact that all those things DO, very temporarily — bring some excitement,
It’s fleeting and disappointing, really.
But it’s better than nothing,
And it’s what EVERYONE ELSE said that was “exciting”. Every advertisement, every movie, and every friend of yours.
They don’t tell you that EXCITEMENT is within.
They don’t tell you that WORK is exciting. They tell you that work is boring! They tell you that you only work so that you can get money for the more exciting things!
They don’t tell you that CREATIVITY is exciting. Almost none of them are creative — creativity requires energy — and it’s easier to just watch others be creative, others live life in the movies.
Finally — no one tells you that THE DAILY LIFE is exciting.
Even the word “DAILY” suggests something common and boring.
Wrong!
It’s only “boring” if you do it the same way. And it’s only “boring” if you define exciting as something necessarily unusual and new,
DAILY LIFE is AS EXCITING AS YOU ARE.
Everything you do is as exciting as exciting you make it,
When you’re bored and demotivated and uninspired — OF COURSE it’s unexciting.
It’s your fault. The fault of what you do, and HOW you do it
You can make ANYTHING exciting,
You could make a JOKE about ANYTHING. About the most boring thing,
Well if it’s so easy to stimulate your mind with a joke — how much easier is it to stimulate it with actual ACTION?
It’s you who is unexciting — not absence of outside excitement,
It’s you who must be MAKING JOKES when everyone is sombre,
It’s you who must be finding NEW CREATIVE WAYS, NEW IMPROVED WAYS, NEW UNTRODDEN WAYS — when everyone is bored and jaded and lazy and demotivated and ossified
Stop seeking excitement outside of you.
DON’T AVOID IT, mind you.
Don’t avoid it, like you don’t want to avoid pleasure,
When EXCITEMENT betides you, take it
When pleasure betides you, please enjoy yourself,
But don’t pursuit any of it,
EVOKE IT WITHIN FIRST,
Before anything yet happened — ALREADY have an attitude of excitation, exhilaration, motivation, inspiration, joy
Then POUR IT into WHATEVER it is that you be doing today,
Then DO take on things exciting, or things boring, WHATEVER it is that you will be doing today,
You’ll be surprised what you may find
You’ll be surprised what you may find.
The “exciting” is boring. It’s NEVER as good as you imagine. It’s unbelievably good the first time, it’s BETTER than you imagined, it’s MORE than you expected… maybe for 5 minutes.
And then it gets boring.
And pleasure feels disgusting, really.
It’s a terrible disappointment, terrible taste in mouth. It was so exciting in your mind, it was such amazing pleasure in your mind — and then you had it — and either it lasted for 5 minutes, or it never came at all,
This is the “exciting” which you pursuit,
The REAL EXCITING is when YOU ARE EXCITED,
And you’ll be surprised what you will find,
You will find depths you didn’t know existed,
You will find beauty you failed to see before,
You will find possibilities you didn’t even conceive of,
Now, THAT’s FUCKING exciting,
You’d be shocked,
You’d be shocked how exciting it is to do something with LOVE, PASSION, CREATIVITY,
And when you import it from the outside — what you’re really only doing is trying to get that FEELING INSIDE, get a little bit of that FIRE INSIDE, fire of love and passion and creativity,
But if you can’t produce it yourself — it will fade away in no time,
And then you’re back with your old boredom and tiredness and lameness.
Let go of it,
Let go of futile hope in anything from the outside lighting that fire,
You must light that fire yourself,
You must get excited yourself,
You must rise up and ACTUALLY MEAN to do something, for once,
Pour all your energy into it,
Pour JOY into it and LOVE and CREATIVITY,
Pour your attention your resources your sweat and tears,
And THEN see if you care,
And when you care — THEN ask yourself what is more “exciting”,
Whether it’s some fancy contrivance that the world dubbed “exciting”,
or whether it’s this FIRE IN YOUR BELLY which was the point all along