True ACCEPTANCE is actually VERY HARD

 

When we think we “do acceptance” — what we’re typically actually only doing is:

–accepting something suboptimal…

-…except with the CAVEAT that we will IMPROVE IT, ERASE IT

…which is not truly acceptance, is it?

We’re still WISHING TO SEE IT GONE, DENY IT

 

TRUE ACCEPTANCE is when:

-you ACCEPT the thing permanently

-EVEN IF you WISH, and could, change it

-because the EXERCISE is to ASSUME THAT YOU COULDN’T

 

You may still choose to change it

You may still choose to get rid of it

But the exercise is to FACE THE REALITY in which you must LIVE WITH IT

That is the meaning of acceptance

 

Furthermore second mistake we make is

we only attempt to ACCEPT THE “BAD”,

We forget that “GOOD”, the “BETTER” — must also be ACCEPTED

 

This is counter-intuitive

Since intuition is that we not only “accept” the good, the improvement — but even CRAVE it

 

Except whether something is good or bad doesn’t change the fact that it is:

1) DIFFERENT

2) CHALLENGING anyway

 

Indeed, “SUCCESS” is as scary as failure

OR even more scary, for often it’s even STRANGER, more NEW

and it comes with greater CHANGES

and it carries HIDDEN TAXES

like resentment of others, greater responsibilities, less guidance and no obvious path forward

 

Indeed,

philosophically, ACCEPTANCE doesn’t discriminate

whether something is “GOOD” or “BAD”, in our transitory opinion — and doesn’t change the NATURE of ACCEPTANCE

Therefore accepting of the “bad”, and accepting of the “good” — must be taken equally seriously

And likewise acceptance of that which we CAN’T change — and that which we CAN change

 

Finally, why do we even accept? Play this acceptance-game?

 

To not accept is to keep having reason to be miserable,

It’s to sign a contract with yourself that you will not be happy (until certain conditions are met)

And it works consciously and subconsciously — since this schema becomes automatic

and then you wonder why you’re miserable, and can’t relax, and can’t just have joy and laugh

 

Second reason,

That which you can’t accept — you will be unable to DEAL with rationally

Indeed because of the negative emotions around it

Obviously you’re only as rational as you are free from emotional distortions

And again: your emotions transcend your awareness of them — and become internalised deeply. You’re not even aware how your FEAR of something is fixing all your thoughts and decisions and actions

 

This is why we play the “acceptance game”

This is the meaning of acceptance