You’re envious of others if you believe they gain and possess at the expense of you gaining and possessing
You’re happy for others if you believe you gain when they gain
Material resources
Social
Status, recognition
Power
Pleasure
Happiness
Life
Health
Self-acceptance
Self-respect
Love
anything
At any one of those matters you may feel lacking
When you’re lacking — of course you believe that the world is lacking
(if it wasn’t lacking (was abundant with it) — then why are you lacking?)
And if you are lacking and the world is lacking — then those that are not lacking — surely gained it at the expense of others
And you’re envious and maybe you’re resentful
And some of us even decide to take from others, without giving
And they don’t view it as wrong. What they view as “wrong” is themselves lacking — when someone else isn’t lacking
Opposite happens when you’re not lacking
You believe that the world isn’t lacking either
(Actually you often overestimate the extent to which something is available — and underestimate your own privilege and good fortune)
You’re not lacking and the world isn’t lacking — of course you want others to NOT be lacking either
You feel great about someone “making” it. You feel great about someone doing great.
It not only doesn’t threaten you, and your own “having” and “being” — it actually reinforces your reality
Make no mistake: many of the “having” are actually lacking
Or you can be lacking in one aspect and having in another
And it can be confusing where you’re lacking and where you’re having
I said: When you’re “having”, when you’re being, when you’re NOT LACKING, when you’re abundant — then you are HAPPY FOR OTHERS
THIS is the true indicator
And if you feel envious of others — then you’re actually lacking
This dichotomy clears out the confusion
And there is confusion because we ourselves are confused
We try to compensate our not-having by having in other domains
We try to compensate our not-having by having in other domain
You don’t accept yourself so you seek acceptance of others
You feel poor within so you become rich without
You regret past failures so you seek more and more successes to alleviate this regret
You’re an ignorant fool so you get a degree
You learn the truth about your compensatory behaviours and escapes and insecurities if you just audit HOW YOU ACTUALLY FEEL
Are you HAPPY FOR OTHERS?
Are you looking for your BROTHER TO GAIN?
Would you rather EXTEND the DISTANCE between YOU and the others — or would you rather TAKE THEM UP, and close that distance?
Answers those questions and you’ll learn if you’re actually having, actually successful, actually happy
Answers those questions and you’ll learn if you’re actually improving your situation — or just compensating , therefore escaping
..Strangely enough — This works in reverse:
When you’re happy for others — you bring MORE of that for yourself
When you’re grateful and satisfied and happy — you bring MORE of that for yourself
If your attitude to having, and those having — if your attitude is negative — you will invariably have a hard time engaging in those same behaviours which would engender that outcome
Essentially: your mental attitude to something becomes self-reinforcing, addictive
This is why “positive thinking” works, even fucking law of attractions works: because you are imbuing your mind and spirit with the attitude and mentality of someone FIT to “having” it, FIT to being “abundant”
Basically, when you envy someone — you automatically condemn them. Thus condemning the behaviours and attitudes which ENGENDERED them “having” and being successful in the first place
but if you love them instead…
If you feel happy for them instead,
Then you will experience no resistance to making that change yourself
You will experience no resistance to being more LIKE them yourself
It will be natural, effortless even
Because you are already experiencing positive emotions in regards to that idea of “having” — you’re ALREADY HAPPY FOR THEM
And positive emotions of course are there to facilitate the right actions — with the negative serving the opposite role (avoidance)
So please understand
Your envy, your condemnation, your antagonism to others — it is a mirror of your own self
It means you’re lacking, starving
And it means you’ll continue lacking, starving
Unless you change your mind
And look at others with love and appreciation and gratitude
And then you will be able to learn from them
And then you will be able to do as well as they do
And then you will be able to give
And then you will be able to receive