I love feeling unwell
When you feel well — everything is well
That’s why I recommend feeling well first — before making things well
But when everything is well — you are deprived of a crucial information
You are deprived of a crucial stressor
You are deprived of a crucial challenge
I love feeling unwell like I love getting unlucky
This is when my Pollyanna life philosophy is tested
This is when my powers of adaptation are tested
Again: When you feel well — everything is well
It becomes a little less important what you’re making out of this precious life of yours, precious time of yours
It becomes a little less important — because you feel so good
When you feel less good, when you doubt, when you struggle — you are challenged to find deeper meaning
You are challenged to ask questions
Sometimes you become a mad zealot, true. But even zealotism has a degree of admirable fire, to bring into one’s life
And more depth
When you feel well — everything is well
Little details of your everyday life become a little less important
This is treacherous
At the end ONLY the details matter
Specifically the details which you control
Your entire life can go in many strange directions. But that problem which is right in front of you — THAT IS REAL
It’s easy to become intoxicated, distracted the the BIG WORLD and GRAND SCHEMES and EXCITING NARRATIVES
But the truth is — life is today
When things don’t go so well — you can learn that fucking lesson
You can distract yourself even worse, for the pain is unbearable
Or you can APPLY yourself more, FOCUS on TANGIBLE DETAILS a little more, focus on REAL PROBLEMS a little more, and try to do a LITTLE BIT BETTER TODAY
Learn this and you truly are unstoppable
This is how you really learn to focus
When you feel unwell — you actually learn how to FEEL WELL
Because this is when you actually get feedback on what truly works
If you can consistently WILL yourself from feeling UNWELL to feeling WELL — you learn what truly makes a difference
And when eventually you stop feeling so unwell — you receive the gift of gratitude
You often feel better than ever!
Gift of suffering is gift of gratitude indeed
Indeed be grateful for feeling unwell
First stop feeling unwell ABOUT feeling unwell
Learn to accept it. This is another wonderful lesson
You will die one day. You will die because your body will not be so well. Learn this lesson.
If you inquire truly, truly deeply, into this UNWELL-state — you begin to appreciate just how WELL you actually are
Everyone is lucky be definition, to be alive
And everyone’s alive is more well than the dead
I love feeling unwell