learn to love what you don’t love

and learn to NOT fall out of love with what you once LOVED

 

both are skills

 

you assume you love what you love

and that you’ll continue loving what you love

and that you probably won’t love what you don’t love

and also

that you don’t choose what you love

 

this is wrong of course

you can choose to love

and then rouse love

the feeling of love

the mindset of love

it’s a though-feeling really, it happens in conjunction

you can train yourself to love, like a dog

you absolutely can choose to love

 

and genuinely love

genuinely rejoice at given thing

genuinely enjoy given thing

genuinely want more of that thing,

and that thing to be celebrated and cherished

 

part the reason you assume you won’t love something you don’t love,

and especially something you dislike,

part of that reason is that you’re so obsessed with greedily seizing all those things you profess to love

if you could just LOVE ANYTHING,

then what special value, what purpose would there be to those things you ALREADY love?

why covet them so strongly and struggle to grasp them — if you could get the same from what you already have?

so there’s a little bit of a perverse incentive to DISDAIN things you don’t love — so that the story of LOVING something, DESIRING something — can be consolidated, amplified

 

ironically, the same perverse incentive to keep desiring something — is what prevents you from acquiring it,

because then you no longer can continue desiring — since you already have it, are satiated with it,

you can only quench your thirst once

 

…indeed, that’s also part of the reason why, once you acquired something, it’s so difficult to STAY IN LOVE with it,

it’s because so often — all that you loved was desire you were experiencing,

anticipation,

and RIDICULOUS fucking fantasy you were producing in your imagination

but now that you have it — you TRULY LEARN that it’s no better to what you already had

you feel as mediocre as before, after but a week

you not only no longer experience love — you feel resentment

 

learning to REMAIN IN LOVE is thus a skill too

 

part of it is getting rid of those ridiculous fantasies and expectations

part of it is getting in touch with the thing as it truly is

and accepting it

and reminding yourself why you loved that thing

 

but part of it is similar to learning to fall in love,

it’s learning to CELEBRATE that thing,

CHERISH that thing

HONOUR that thing

give ATTENTION to that thing

be GRATEFUL for that thing