Everything that happens to you can bring you closer to reality — or farther away from it
You view the gifts of fate in regard to the short-term benefits they entail
If you like something — you’re happy with such gift
If you don’t like something — you curse such gift
There’s a problem with this attitude
To even attempt to appraise the gifts of fate is ignorant — for you don’t truly know the ultimate meaning of what happens to you
You are doing yourself a disfavour by assigning value to the random outcomes of life — and you definitely are doing yourself a disfavour if you’re taking them emotionally and personally
YOU are responsible
Whatever you make — you make
And whatever happens to you — happens to you
Those things are philosophically clearly separated — even though they are intertwined in practice (you do a little bit of this, get a little lucky with that, etc)
You can’t blame yourself for what you had no control over… and you MUST blame yourself for EVERY SINGLE THING you did have control over
And you always have control over WHAT YOU DO
Always
So why don’t you leave the moral judgement for WHAT YOU DO — rather to what fate deigned to give you?
But there’s an even deeper aspect to the gifts of fate — besides their short-term apparent value
Everything that happens to you can bring you closer to reality — or farther away from it
And obviously the more divergent the outcome is from the reality — the farther it takes you away from it
What it means in practice is:
An excessively unfortunate event will traumatise you — rendering you ill-equipped to live — which means ill-equipped to face reality
Conversely: an excessively fortunate event will SPOIL you — rendering you ill-equipped to live — which means ill-equipped to face reality
Now, it’s uncommon to understand this truth
We take our good fortunes for granted
We take our bad fortunes for granted
In truth: most men are not really very proactive in life
Yes, they “do” something — but it’s not the real doing — not unless one is doing something new
You can’t get closer to reality without a clear feedback loop: action and reaction and correction and result…
I would say most men take their entire lives for granted: all the positive, all the negative
In XXI century we live like kings — and you take it for granted
In XXI century we live like slaves — and you take it for granted
You never questioned any of that, you never chose any of that — and you NEVER DID anything about that
But then there is all the turmoil of your life, all the struggles and cravings and uncertainties — and you DO attempt to resolve them
And what matters then is how well equipped you are to face reality
And you are only as equipped to deal with reality as undistorted your perception is
And your perception is as distorted as bad the bad things were, when they happened to you
And your perception is as distorted as good the good things were, when they happened to you
But your perception is as clear as many real world problems you solved
As clear as many real things your brought to life, real things you did, with your own hands
Perhaps you’re entirely unfit to solve your current problems
Perhaps you never really did solve any problems — just did what you were told — and got lucky along the way
Or perhaps you were doing all the right things, EXCEPT for giving up too early — failing to overcome the randomness of life
This chaos will dictate entire identities
All you think of yourself might be wrong, and likely is
But there is one thing which can be relied on — it’s WHAT YOU DID TODAY
And what you DID today — the REAL problems you SOLVED TODAY — that is quite fucking real
And this is the cure
Gifts are poisoned
You should ask yourself — did I earn it with my own hands?
The answer can be ‘yes’, it can be ‘no’, and it can be ‘I DON’T KNOW’
When the answer is anything but ‘yes’ — and it rarely is ‘yes’ — you RELAX
You don’t think too much about it, you don’t talk much about it — you just FOCUS on your WORK
As tempting as it is to identify and take credits for the great fortunes the fate indulged you with — it’s as detrimental as it is to take on the “victim mentality” upon a few unfortunate events
Gifts are poisoned
You should be grateful for EVERYTHING the fate granted you
You never know what it means
Make the best out of it, whatever that can be
Then go and focus on reality, focus on your WORK
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Addendum:
This wisdom can be applied to others too
You can tell where others are coming from based on how they explain their outcomes
Fake humbleness is stupid — but indeed humbleness is a mark of competence and maturity
One who doesn’t understand the randomness-factor in his profession (or life) is rarely ever competent.
Furthermore
SPOILING is real, just like trauma is real
It’s not their fault what happened to them — but it’s their fault how they responded to it
And most are not equipped to deal with excessively divergent outcomes
It will not bring them closer to reality
Which is why they will be less reliable to work with, deal with